This Ursine Calling

B and his car were not home when I returned – that kind of gut punch – that sort of empty room, which is not really empty at all.

When Dad showed up unexpectedly to the maternal blessing and benediction, my fingertips surged with flame and my arms began to writhe like hungry snakes. I wanted to destroy his selfishness, his lack of consideration, his unawareness.

A vision of that day at the river came to mind – how safe I felt – how Love showed me that nothing could touch or harm me – not ever. And I was reminded of how Love doesn't need fear or anger to enter the power play.

Power. Can we talk about it? There are things I need to know.

K gifted sprigs of lavender from her garden and also, three pizzas. Those who know a little something about benevolence probably know a little something about injury and injustice.

I asked tarot about taking my clothes off for a man and the card showed a woman putting her hand in the lion's mouth. He has his paw on her leg and her free hand is gently caressing his mane. He is hungry but does not eat her. She is Strength and is not afraid. Tarot added: p.s. - stop asking others for validation.

Even given the sanctity of trails, it is in the absence of a trail whereby one understands or appreciates what a trail is. Walking through what is uncut is entirely different than the mildly meditative pace of drifting a path.

This ursine calling; this eternal homage.

And now, fireflies have left nighttime's shapeless hours to the crickets.
This.